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Keep The Fire Burning
When people think of jealousy, they sometimes get the proverbial “neighbor’s new car” picture in their minds. Yet jealousy can be much more complicated than that.
Jealousy can involve any combination of things. We may be jealous of someone’s social/economic status; another country’s prosperity; someone’s abilities, family or loved ones, possessions, expensive new gadget, fame, money, cars, ideas, girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, anatomic features, intelligence, recognition, entire life—anything!
With so many possible ways to become jealous, how can we overcome this? The truth is: It’s not easy.
Why is jealousy spiritually dangerous?
The spiritual danger in jealousy is clearly evident in the pages of the Bible. The 10th Commandment, “You shall not covet,” includes the concept of jealousy. Jealousy can be a form of covetousness. Hebrews 13:5 states, “Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’”
This verse brings up other dangers related to covetousness: discontent and lack of thankfulness. When we turn to Him, God is our provider and He gives us what we need. Jealousy in essence says, “What God has given me is not enough!”
The apostle Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 6:8, “And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content”(emphasis added throughout). Jealousy continually whispers to us, “God’s gifts are not good enough. You need/deserve/should have whatever you want in this life.”
Being content with having our needs met in this life can go a long way in reminding us that this life is temporary and that the Kingdom of God is coming. Therefore, jealousy hinders the fruits of faithfulness and goodness.
So let’s make a change. How can we overcome jealousy?
Identify the cause of jealous thinking
Make a written list of the stimuli that provoke jealous or envious thinking. To determine this, ask yourself questions like:
Why am I not happy with my situation?
What makes me think that if I received what I’m jealous about, things would be so much better?
Are there things I see on TV that give me jealous thoughts?
What do my eyes wander over that I may have to avoid in order to stop these thoughts?
Again, remember that God wants to bless us and give us wonderful gifts, but only gifts that won’t be harmful for us. All good gifts come from God (James 1:17), so gifts that are going to be negative to our lives must come from someone else.
A general rule of thumb when dealing with jealousy is that, realistically, the majority of the time it involves wants rather than needs. So, let’s analyze the jealous thoughts.
Analyze and compare jealous thinking to reality
Jealous thoughts are usually easy to identify, but sometimes they can sneak right past our brain sensors and develop into a feeling of envy without us even knowing what happened. Write down the various thoughts you experience so you can analyze them: “I can’t live without having this!” “Why does that person have so much while I have so little?” “Why do I always struggle for things while those people just get them for free?” “That’s not fair—I should have that!”
When we analyze such thoughts, we see that they can be very petty, greedy, lazy, unthankful and any number of other undesirable attributes. Overall though, we see covetousness.
